Guilt and shame are twin demons from the past, which can trouble any of us. However, in guilt, one is also susceptible to shame. The frail boundary between “I did something wrong” & “I am wrong” dissolves and hence, makes guilt a more challenging emotion to handle. Guilt distorts our reality and causes turbulence in our minds, wreaks havoc on our thoughts and emotions. It is a karma trap which can imprison anyone for entire life. It can undermine our health, behavior, & relationships. The standard approaches like “let go,” “move on,” “substitution,” “overcome” & “don't think about it” worsen our condition as we try hard to bypass our suffering. Suppressing or substituting our thoughts, emotions, & feelings creates more pain. While we can try to rationalize the guilt by reasoning endlessly within our mind, but this does not help us in the long run.
Rather than overcoming the emotion, embrace it. The past is only in our thoughts. Embracing is neither a battle nor a victory nor defeat. It is complete openness and acceptance of the present moment. We open ourselves to our vulnerabilities and then we understand that there is nothing to be afraid of. But it takes a lot of practice.
Embracing guilt allows us to think any kind of thoughts, stories, and reasonings about the past, without any resistance in the present moment. Embracing reduces the additional suffering which one experiences by living in denial or resisting the suffering as an integral part of life. Further, we move deeper into embracing guilt by availing the present to transform guilt into self-forgiveness and self-compassion.
Embracing Guilt allows our hearts and minds to be touched by forgiveness & love through our vulnerabilities.
The above mentioned thoughts are some pointers from a book where I have attempted to bring peace for guilt sufferers in a structured approach. The book is aimed to understand guilt, dispel myths, explore beliefs, and ground the reader to the path of self-forgiveness and self-love through one's vulnerabilities. The core message is already mentioned here, but in case you read the book, please share your views.
In the end just remember that you don’t need any validation from the past nor from the future to live this moment fully. May peace be upon you. You can also reach me at twitter “@abhinavp43”.
